Whod you bang
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
I'm just crazy horny about you
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
Randomize
