So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
I talked a bachelorette party out of a 4 person bucket of long islands, and drank it by myself. Please call me a taxi. The fat brides maid just grabbed my cock
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
Randomize
