I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
Come back. She's looking through naked pics of his exes on his phone and questioning him about them and I'm too drunk to walk away.
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
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