you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
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