Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
i bought another $5 worth of vodka. with change. i look like a homeless alcoholic. i need your dino cups or else i'll be forced to make a giant jello bowl shot
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
Randomize
