Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
See, the Lortab wasn't working enough, so I thought "hey, vodka can speed that up! That's how science works!" Which probably should've been my indication that the Lortab was in fact working
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize