nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
I had to go to the front counter of the restaurant and ask for the key because I was "pretty sure my friend is passed out in the bathroom right now"
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
I shit you not. I was sitting on Brian's balcony...still drunk from the night before, and a hummingbird flew onto the patio, stared me right in the face and flew away. I feel like it was God's way of telling me, "Stop drinking."
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
Randomize
