She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
Randomize
