Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
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