That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
If a weird guy texts you in the near future asking if you are satan just go with it
Randomize
