The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
Since you didn't call me back last night, I can only assume that in 9 months you're going to have a child that I'm going to refer to as, "Daddy's little mistake in Miami."
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
just found a carrot inside of a baby sock. living with toddlers is like living with tiny hammered people.
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
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