Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
She kept giving the uber driving directions and we all thought they were wrong so we'd send him the other way. Turns out she wasn't guiding us home, but to the half gallon that she hid in the bushes on the way to the bar.
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
Randomize
