I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
Decided to write a book called "girls don't poop and other myths I wish I still believed in"
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
Having to grow a landing strip to cover the bruises from pole dancing. Thanks for the birthday present, but next time, maybe just a gift card?
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
Randomize
