Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
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