Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
I found dried jizz from last night on my leg while feeding an infant a bottle. I am not fit to care for children
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
Randomize