Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
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