Old men and throwing up are my life now.
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
Randomize
