Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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