No stitches, just platelets and will power
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
Randomize
