Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
Randomize
