Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
i just has to use a gift card to Target that one of my students parents got me to buy Plan B bc my bank account is -$0.08 so my 2017 is starting exactly how i pictured.
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
Randomize
