so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
Apparently the guard had to repeat "you're too drunk to get in" three times before I understood. I guess he was right.
i just woke up to seventeen texts from you saying all the things you would have done for a french fry.
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
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