I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
Last night drunk me texted a sure to be hungover me my class schedule and locations for today. I'm like a mom preparing her child for the first day of school
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
Randomize
