super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
Best surprise in my car. A cookie, sliced kiwi and the rest of my margarita. Work is going to be awesome.
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
Randomize
