Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
Just went to court for a citation. Guess who my DA was? That girl I ATM'd last weekend. No ticket for me!
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
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