hey babe. i'll pick you up in my mom's car. with my mom. she has nothing to do tonight.
Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
Randomize
