You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
i was taking a dump when this random girl ran in, puked all over my lap, then passed out on the floor
did you bang her?
seriously?
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
Randomize
