wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
You know how the doctor said I need to stop being vegan unless I find a way to get more protein? There's protein in beer. The doctor wants me to drink more beer.
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
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