No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
My mom just walked in on me naked taking a shit and packing a bowl...the only comment she makes is, she wants her Tupperware back after my pot's out of it. Best mom ever.
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
Randomize
