therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
Yeah, he hid all the toilet paper and took a video of me looking for it before I shit my pants. Definitely playing that clip at our wedding.
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
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