Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
Adding to the list of things I have said out loud at the bar that I shouldn't have: "I am the yoda of sucking dick"
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
Randomize
