me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
We just shotgunned beers for America
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
You slammed your face into the toilet and declared you were moving your bed into the bathroom in the morning. Also, you insisted on crawling everywhere because feet are "overrated."
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
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