Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
Randomize
