I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
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