Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
I'll truly miss your penis but your use of words and phrases such as bae, yolo, swag, and totes have ruined how attractive you once were.
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
Randomize
