i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart.
That's funny. Are they weird looking???
OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
Btw "you gettin a workout in" isn't a great gym pickup line. Like no I'm fucking grabbing lunch on my way to class.
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
Last night when we were having sex he put the condom on backwards the first time. While he was putting the second one on I blew up the first one, made it into a balloon and hit him in the head with it. I think we're over the honeymoon stage.
Randomize
