we're blogging at a bar
We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
Watching Miami Social reminded me of how much I miss snorting coke with burger king straws in a life guard hut on the beach until we noticed someone was drowning.
Did you save them?
Who?
just dd'd my mom home while she begged me to let her drunk dial my ex, jammed out to party in the usa, and then passed the fuck out. thanks for the genes mom.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
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