Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
I tried to walk home in my heels. And I fell into a snow bank. And then I cried and a policeman came up to me and said I can't sit in a snowbank and got me a cab. So maybe that's where I left my credit card. I remember the cop asking me if I was old enough to drink, too. OMG. How embarrassing. Pretty sure I told him to "leave me alone."
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
My mom found me this morning passed out, face down on my dinning room floor
That must have been one awkward situation haha
Well I woke up in my bed.... I don't remember her finding me
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
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