He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Randomize
