I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
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