Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
All she gave me for breakfast was raw toast. How can she expect me to eat raw toast?
You mean bread?
My mom is pretending to be Paula Deen while making breakfast...I'm pretty sure she's sober.
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
Randomize