I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
Randomize