My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
I just tried to pick my 105-lb puppy up and accidentally fingered its asshole
There are some things we keep to ourselves Brian
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
Randomize
