Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
Randomize
