entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
I think people are normalizing furries
OMG I accidentally abducted a cat. Now there is a cat in my apartment. I NEED TO UNDO WHAT I HAVE DONE
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
Randomize
