I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
stop texting me about your public sex.
says she who narrated getting eaten out in a movie theatre over text to me
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
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