I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
just found out I caught the bouquet at the wedding. I win for being the drunkest yet most functional bridesmaid.
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Randomize
