Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
Randomize
