I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
Randomize
