so i stopped by cvs on the way home this morning, turns out hallmark doesnt make an im sorry my friend puked on your friend card, call me if were still speaking
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
My roommate was tripping balls last night, he kept me up all fucking night
Roommate? Please tell me you're not calling your cat your roommate
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
Randomize
